The Invisible Man...

Yesterday I had $1 in my bank account.

I searched the house for lose change to get me on the train to the city for today's PD. I'd already thanked the universe for the positioning of two PDs into my week which were accessible by train...especially when the shrill beep began which signified the rapidly emptying petrol tank last night. I had to get thru to Wednesday arvo...then I could fill up!

Leaving the car at the station I sat and enjoyed the ride into the city, a luxury I am rarely ever afforded.

Exiting the station into bustling Melbourne city I followed my phones gps to the pd destination, walking in rhythm with the throng of those around me. A mixture of suits, uniforms, casual wear...all with a purpose and destination in mind.

As I walked up to the destination I noticed on a metal seat outside there was a red, open mound of a sleeping bag. As I walked past I looked carefully but it simply looked like a traveller had dumped their things there, for no human could be seen under the crumpled pile.

At morning tea break I exited to buy a water at the McDonalds across the road and the red sleeping bag was folded upon a backpack and there sat a man. Asian in appearance, watching as the world walked by him.

And walked by they did. Fast, slow, chatting, silent...all walked past, no glance, no acknowledgment. He was the invisible man.




I entered the PD once more and felt like the biggest loser and selfish person in the world. I hadn't spoken to him, I didn't acknowledge him...I was weak and no better than anyone else walking past as though he didn't exist!

The day went on and the afternoon session of one of the best PDs (professional development) I have attended in a long while began to come to an end, I took my time exiting the building, my stomach doing somersaults, my heart beating strongly as yet again I walked past..but this time all that was on the seat were belongings. No invisible man. I need not feel guilty for partaking in no communication...no eye contact! (I feel so terrible even thinking let alone writing that!)

But I did wonder where he was?

Did he go across the road to get food? To use the toilet? What a naive, educated idiot I was! For there he was...peeing on a tree around the corner. Toilet? Buying food? I was a moron for even thinking such things and felt like an indulged child who didn't truly understand the REAL world!

I crossed the road and entered the McDonald's across the road and ordered a meal that I had no intention of eating. I grabbed serviettes and filled the bag with them.

My heart and stomach beat and swirl as a thousand thoughts went through my mind! What would happen? Would he get mad? Would he be able to eat it? (allergies/halal etc) it wasn't the healthiest food I could have gotten, would he judge me? Then the answering thoughts slapped those ones around the head..he is homeless...I don't think he will be fussy! What would I say to him? What would I do?

Click click click...The lights changed and the little green man told me it was time to move forward. As I walked across the road, food and drink in hand I looked at the invisible man and his deep brown eyes looked right back into mine.

He was old. He was frail. As I approached, his mouth opened revealing gaps of gum free of teeth. He sat up straight as I held out the food. I smiled, he nodded his head and uttered in broken English, "thankyou, thankyou very much". I nodded, smiled and told him its ok, it's ok, your welcome.

And I walked away.

I should have said more. Told him I'm sorry. I'm very sorry I have a home and family and fresh meal to go home to. Sorry that I have long hot showers and drive a big arsed car. I'm sorry I have a job and can buy things. I'm sorry that this metal bench seat is your home. I'm sorry all I needed to do was wait until Wednesday to have more than a dollar. I'm sorry that your Wednesday may never come.

But instead I said, "for you" and "it's ok" and walked away feeling a little lighter of heart for simply doing something...even if it was nothing of consequence at all.

As I boarded the train surrounded by suits and uniforms and casual clothes of all variety, all moving with life and purpose I thought of the man and wondered if his belly ever felt full? if he ever felt safe? If someone shows him care each day? If he cares if they do?

Today I went into the city to learn how to empower girls to be confident and have positive friendships. I left the city having learnt that and a lesson about myself. Maybe what i did wasn't so big in the scheme of things...but I've learnt that my empathy for societal issues has crossed over from simply thinking I care and feeling anger at the injustices to actually taking action to prove it.

As the suburbs zoomed past the train window on the way home, I vowed to myself that this first action would not be a one off. But instead would set a precedent for the future. His gratitude was one of the best presents I've received in a long time...and selfishly I suspect I walked away from our interaction with more gained than he.