I sit, phone in hand and scroll, click, open, close apps.
Like opening the fridge looking for food over and over, futile searching and distraction from what must be done.
Whirling, thumping noise fills the house free of calls for mum, squeals of laughter or pain. Child free silence. Soon the whirling, thumping will stop..washing cycle complete.
Tapping rocks in glass, turtle tank filter..reminder of a job to be done, tank filled, filter cleaned.
Distracting tasks consume me as I avoid that which must be done but hurts to do.
Taping boxes, filling them up, sorting into donate, throw out, pack. Tasks leading to the future stirring up memories from the past.
Avoid says my brain, avoid says my heart. Offering other distractions...shopping, browsing, working distractions and do the packing goes undone.
But it's not going away..the day comes closer and closer...opportunities diminish to complete it without cries for mummy and little fingers unpacking and salvaging what's been thrown or donated.
Must be done....
Don't want to!...
Burn the lot? If only...
Scrolling, clicking, shopping..stop! Distractions be gone.
Time to harden my heart..
And pack!
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